Have you ever whispered to yourself, “That’s not fair”?
You watched someone else get the promotion, the breakthrough, the relationship, the applause—and deep down, something inside of you sank. You smiled on the outside, but inside you were thinking, “Lord, I’ve been faithful too. What about me?”
We’ve all been there.
It starts young—when your sibling gets the bigger slice of cake or more time on the Xbox. But if we’re honest, not much changes when we grow up. The stakes are just higher now. It’s not about dessert anymore. It’s about feeling unseen, unappreciated, or overlooked.
But here’s the good news: God sees. And He’s not just fair. He’s better than fair—He’s gracious.
That Birthday Party Mentality
Remember those little-kid birthday parties where everyone had to get a gift bag, even though it wasn’t their party? Why? Because toddlers don’t yet know how to celebrate someone else without wondering, “Where’s mine?”
Funny thing is… many of us never fully outgrow that.
Someone else gets married.
A friend buys a house.
A co-worker is promoted.
A girl you invited to church meets her Boaz on week three—and you’ve been here three years.
Suddenly, your heart whispers again: “That’s not fair.”
But maturity in our faith looks like learning to celebrate someone else’s win, even when you’re still waiting for yours. Because here’s the truth: their blessing doesn’t cancel yours. It’s not a pie being sliced down to nothing. It’s a buffet, and your plate is still being prepared.
The Workers in the Vineyard
Jesus told a story in Matthew 20 that hits this nerve right on the head. A landowner hires workers at different times of the day—6 AM, 9 AM, noon, 3 PM, and even 5 PM.
When the day ends, he pays everyone the same.
Naturally, the early risers who broke their backs all day were furious. “That’s not fair!” they cried.
But the landowner—who represents God—essentially says, “Didn’t you agree to this? Don’t I have the right to be generous?”
Boom. Right in the gut.
Because isn’t that how it goes? We start comparing. We stop trusting. We forget the joy of being called in the first place. We grumble instead of being grateful.
Comparison Is a Thief
Let’s be honest—when we see someone else get blessed, our first thought isn’t always, “Praise God for them!” Sometimes it’s, “Wait, I’ve been here longer. I’ve worked harder. Why them?”
But Jesus never called us to compete. He called us to complete our own race.
If you’re a 6 AM person—faithful, steady, always early—don’t lose heart. God’s not shortchanging you. He’s just writing a different story.
And if you’re a 5 PM person—someone who feels like they showed up late to the party—rejoice. His grace includes you, too. That’s the beauty of it.
Grace doesn’t play by the rules of fairness. It rewrites them.
You Complain, You Remain
One of the most powerful truths from this message?
“You complain, you remain. You praise; you get a raise.”
Grumbling delays gratitude. And gratitude moves the heart of God.
When we get caught up in doing the math on someone else’s miracle, we miss what God’s trying to multiply in our own lives. If he gave them $100 for 15 minutes, what might He be preparing for you that’s beyond a paycheck or promotion?
Sometimes, He’s building something so big in you that it’s taking longer to pour the foundation. You’re not behind—you’re being fortified.
Trust Over Negotiation
Here’s something we forget: the early workers negotiated their pay. The latecomers said, “Whatever is right, we’ll accept.”
That shift in posture matters.
When we come to God with terms and expectations, we limit what He can do. But when we come with open hands and say, “I trust You,” we open the door for a blessing far beyond what we imagined.
So, let’s stop handing God our to-do list and start handing Him our trust. His plan is always better—even when it doesn’t look fair from our angle.
God’s Delay Isn’t Denial
There was a couple who once prayed over a piece of property they desperately wanted. It had everything they dreamed of—space, beauty, potential. They even walked the land, claimed it, and believed in it.
But someone else bought it.
At the time, it felt like a punch to the gut. Unfair. Frustrating. Confusing.
But years later, they realized something powerful: what they thought was a loss was actually protection. God wasn’t denying them—He was guiding them to something greater.
Sometimes when doors close, it’s not rejection. It’s redirection.
So, if you’re waiting… if things aren’t moving as fast as you hoped… don’t lose heart. A delay isn’t a dead end. God may be building something so strong, secure, and lasting that it takes time to set the foundation right.
He’s not done with you yet.
The Real “Not Fair” Moment
Think about this: it wasn’t fair that Jesus left heaven, walked among us, and died for sins He didn’t commit.
It wasn’t fair that He bore our shame, took our punishment, and gave us grace.
It wasn’t fair that we sinned and He saved.
But that’s the gospel.
So, when you feel like life isn’t fair, remind yourself: you don’t want fair. You want grace. And grace always finds a way to lift you when life lets you down.
Let’s Practice This Together
The next time someone tells you they got the job, the relationship, the house, or the healing—you know, the thing you’ve been praying for—try this:
Smile. Mean it (or at least practice until you do).
Say, “I’m so happy for you.”
And remind yourself: if God did it for them, He’s still in the neighborhood.
Your turn is coming.
Reflection and Action
Ask yourself:
- Am I trusting God’s grace or negotiating my worth?
- Can I celebrate others while I wait for my own blessing?
- What am I still holding onto that makes me say, “That’s not fair”?
Let’s grow past the comparison. Let’s celebrate, even when it stings a little. Because joy in someone else’s win doesn’t subtract from your story—it multiplies faith for yours.
Think of someone in your life who’s been blessed recently. Text them. Celebrate them. Pray for them. Then take a quiet moment with God and say: “I trust You. Even when I don’t understand. I know you’re not done with me yet.”
And if this message spoke to you, share it. Someone else might need the reminder that grace wins—even when life doesn’t feel fair.